The Hidden Cost of Being ‘The Reliable One’

Hello dear reader,

Have you ever looked at your calendar and thought, ‘How did it get this full?’ You swear you only said yes to a couple of things… but now your days are stacked so high you can barely see over them.

You’re tired. You’re stretched. You’re somehow both busy and behind. And yet, the thought of saying no still makes you feel guilty. 

I know that feeling too.

I’ve had so many seasons where I overfilled my life. Always happy to help, always keen to be involved - but in the process, I stretched myself far too thin, leaving very little for myself.If I’m honest, there were times when I said yes not just out of kindness, but because being needed felt a lot like being valuable.

So I kept showing up - for everyone but me.

One New Year, while chatting with our grown-up kids, they gently called me out. They said something needed to shift. They encouraged me to make sure that my full life of commitments included one more: a commitment to myself.

In this week’s podcast episode, I’m digging into why so many of us end up chronically overcommitted - and how we might start untangling ourselves from the expectations (internal and external) that keep us stuck in that loop.

But if you're not in listening mode just yet, here are a few things I’m noticing—about overcommitment, and about what it costs us:

This episode is for anyone who’s tired of being stretched too thin, but doesn’t quite know how to step back without guilt. I’ve been there. I still find myself there sometimes. But I’m learning (slowly, imperfectly) that saying no is sometimes the most loving thing I can do - for others and for myself. 

If that resonates, I’d love for you to join me for the full episode.

With love,

Hannah x

P.S. What’s one small no you could practice this week? A graceful, guilt-free no? If you feel like sharing, I’d love to hear from you.